Week 3 in Review: Split Down the Middle

an image of a split in bowling
It beats a swing and a miss, right?

If Week 3 could only be described in one word, it would have to be CHAOS…right?

Consider this.  Of the 16 games on the schedule, half of the Favored Teams did go on to Win their matchup.  But what was really interesting (particularly to a small portion of fans, as Al Michaels would no doubt mention) is that only four teams covered the spread.


I’m tellin’ ya, the carnage was everywhere!

Chicago upsets Pittsburgh.  Miami was humbled by the New York Jets.  And Carolina lost at Home to New Orleans by THREE TOUCHDOWNS!

Who had all of that?

But that’s reason number four thousand and eighty on why we love NFL Football.  Nobody knows anything!

Again – what a weekend it was.  On top of that, seven of the games’ final margin of victory was by 6 points or fewer.  New England Won by 3.  Green Bay Won by 3.  Philadelphia Won by 3.

What do these teams have in common?  They were all playing at Home AND were favored by at least 6 points.  In fact, the Eagles & Packers were playing Winless teams at Home to boot!  And each managed to Win by a lone Field Goal.

Even Vegas was fooled by that.

And that’s why Pro Football is unrivaled in sport.  It’s because each game means so much to a team’s season, yet the outcomes can be tougher to predict than the Powerball.  At times. Which combines to deliver a captivating, exciting, hard hitting, emotional roller coaster of a spectacle that is matched by literally no other events in and outside of sports.

Football’s the freakin’ best man.

So…with all of that said, how did the weekly picks go?

Uggggggggh!  So-so.  Time to check the hits and misses.


Last Week’s Picks

To tell ya the truth, They ain’t too bad.  Given the (inherently) unpredictable nature of actual NFL Games, anybody that tells you that they can bat .750 or better is lying to you.

I mean, who the hell sees Pittsburgh losing by a Touchdown (minus the Extra Point) to the Bears?  No offense Chicago, but you knew the world would take the Steelers in your game.

Yeah, you get it.  The shit is hard to predict.  And part of my deal here is to prognosticate ballgames; but even I ain’t crazy enough to try to call the full slate!

Anyhow, let’s review:


Baltimore (-4) vs Jacksonville (over/under 39) – My call of the year (so far).  I’m not gonna pretend like I had some obscure, detailed knowledge on the Jags.  I didn’t.  But I did know that these guys have a decent ballclub – they can Run The Ball and play some Defense.  I can’t comment on their Special Teams, but if you can do those 1st two things pretty good, then you have a chance to take anybody.  And what’s more, Jacksonville plays well in that London game.  Or so I thought.  But I was wrong.  Anyways, I trusted them to sneak up on an unsuspecting Ravens team that had beaten up on the creampuffs of their Division (& had never played in the London game).  And I was right.  But 44-7!?  That damn sure was a surprise!  I understand that Baltimore was jetlagged.  Baltimore was sluggish.  But to allow Jacksonville to whup you like that is definitely un-Raven-like.  It kinda makes you wonder how good them Ravens really are.  But that question gets answered as soon as this Sunday: when Pittsburgh shows up at M&T.

Nailed the 1st one on the board!

Baltimore          7
Jacksonville   44 ✓


New York(N) vs Philadelphia (-6) (o/u 43) – The Giants are some sorry bastards, I swear.  I just KNEW that New York would do whatever it took to leave Philadelphia with that W.  And I’ll give the blue men group some credit; they did not go away.  They hung in there and fought tooth & nail like their season depended on it (which it did).  But Philly made more plays in a slugfest.  And that’s why ya gotta love The NFC East!  It seems like every single game is a fist fight.  But Sunday, Philly proved to be the tougher team at Home.  And holding serve at Home is critical – so Philly gets props for that.  But in the process, they end up losing Darren Sproles for the year to a torn ACL & a broken arm (damn!).  So it will be interesting to see how the Eagles navigate through that injury the rest of the season.  But they did what they were supposed to do in Week 3.

New York(N)  24 ✓
Philadelphia   27


Denver (-3) vs Buffalo (o/u 40.5) – What the hell happened here?  To be perfectly honest with you, I don’t know what happened in this game.  I didn’t even bother to look at the box score in the paper.  I’m disgusted with myself for even touching this game, because something told me to stay away since Denver had yet to play a Road Game.  And in that circumstance, it’s best to stay away from a team with unproven parts until they prove it 1st.  I even mentioned that in the game preview.  But hats off to Buffalo.  They’re 2-1 & in a position to strike.  We’ll see how they fare going forward.  I’ve got my eye on you, Buffalo Bills.  Are you going to challenge New England?

Denver   16 ✓
Buffalo   26


Cincinnati vs Green Bay (-9) (o/u 44.5) – Although Cincinnati (like New York) is staring at a goose egg in the Win column, these guys fought their asses off in Lambeau.  I was impressed, even though Winning there was too tall an order for this team.  But that in that 1st Half the Bengals gave the Packers all the heat they could handle.  Unfortunately for Cincy, this is a four Quarter game.  And they had to know that Green Bay would come back.  And come back they did.  I’m not sure you’ll find too many sane people willing to bet against Aaron Rodgers playing football IN Wisconsin.  Nice try Bengals, but no dice.  Although you did beat the spread! (which crushed me)

Cincinnati   24
Green Bay   27 


Crazy, crazy week.  I ended up splitting everything down the middle on these picks.  Some weeks, what can ya do?  There’s so much randomness to the league, even the sharps have trouble handicapping games (especially in the early season), but they don’t care.  They still make out.

It’s the average Joe Schmo that doesn’t.  But that doesn’t stop the action, now does it?

Anyhow, on to Week 4.

Week 3 Results

ATS: 2-2 (It’s getting there)

Redskins: 1-0


Quick Hits

The Best Division outside The NFC East is: There ain’t one.  Folks, if all this The-NFC-East-is-the-best talk pisses you off, it’s because the shit is true.  New England plays in a trash Division.  The Packers went to Overtime to beat a Winless team.  And the ENTIRE AFC North lost Sunday.  Meanwhile, the NFC East Teams that played outside The Division beat their Opponents by an average of two Touchdowns.  And they Beat Contending teams.  The rest of The League is following The Beast this week.

The worst team in The League is: The Cleveland Browns.  Look, I honestly don’t believe that you’re the worst Cleveland; but the Jets Won on Sunday.  Whaddiya want from me?  You gotta help me help you here.  Win a ballgame!  And don’t let me catch you back here no more.

The Best Team in The League is: The Kansas City Chiefs.  And that’s The Redskins next opponent on Monday Night.  Talk about a monster Early Season matchup!  The Chiefs are kicking ass and taking names.  But will they still be in this slot come this time next week?  We shall see.

Stop Overrating…The New England Patriots.  Do you realize that they were a Tom Brady Final Drive away from being beaten AT HOME to a team with a Rookie Quarterback?  Did you know that the Patriots currently sit in 2nd Place in their Division?  And were you aware that Belichick’s Defense gives up an average of 31.66 Points a game?  Yeah, they’ll still Win the AFC East (because it’s horrible).  But these ain’t your older brother’s Pats.  Those teams are gone.

Stop Underrating…The Washington Redskins.  That’s right.  The way The Skins dogged Oakland on National TV made a statement that they’re going to be a force to be reckoned with this season.  And if they go to KC & Win on Monday Night, this could be a special year in DC.  Things are getting mighty interesting in the nation’s capital.

And If The Super Bowl Was Today…Hell, I like Atlanta to meet Kansas City.  Although I have my doubts about both getting there, the way they’re playing right now they each deserve the nod.  And in this fictitious matchup I would take Kansas City to hoist The Lombardi.  That would be one helluva strength on strength ballgame.

Now that Week 3 is in the books, the snapshot has been taken.  The fun begins with watching it come into focus.

It has only just begun.

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