Week 5: Picks and Predictions

An image of Week 5 Picks and Predictions
The BYE Week Edition.

Helluva season, right?  If there’s one thing we know so far, it’s that nobody knows anything.

The defending Super Bowl Champion went into this week sporting the worst Total Defense (and Pass Defense) in The National Football League.

That’s right.

What’s more, Seattle can’t score, Baltimore can’t beat anyone outside of Ohio, and Tampa Bay doesn’t have an NFL Kicker.

But wait, there’s more!  Oakland (a Preseason Super Bowl Favorite) has struggled mightily in the past few weeks.  Tennessee and Carolina have both been wildly inconsistent throughout the young season.

And the whispers are getting louder; the New York Giants look like they’re the worst team in The NFL this season.

And it’s only Week 5!

What a year this is shaping up to be.  So let’s pick some damn games.

Now, as a bonus (and because The Redskins are on their Bye Week) I’m gonna pick six ballgames.  I say we try to get that magic back.

And on that note…shall we?


(NOTE: these Point Spreads are courtesy of ESPN)


New York(A) vs Cleveland (Pick’em) (o/u 39.5)
and image of Week 5 Picks NYJ vs CLE helmets

This one’s a toughie.  Truth is, I can see it going either way.  And so can Vegas!  That’s why they made this game a Pick Em (which is kinda cheap).  Anyways, the Jets have earned my respect.  They ain’t the doormat that everyone says they are.  Hell, they’re batting .500 after the first month the season.  But can they keep it going in Cleveland?  Interesting question.  The Browns on the other hand have struggled a little more than I expected.  But to be fair to them, they’ve had to play their whole Division coming right outta the gate.  Although my expectation of them was to be more competitive than this, will they right the ship in this matchup?  I don’t think so.  As is stands right now, the New York Jets are the better team & they will prove it on The Field.


Take the over.
New York(A)  26 ✓
Cleveland       22




Tennessee vs Miami  (No Line)
an image of Week 5 Picks TENN vs MIA helmets

Who are you Tennessee?  Are you the team that beat (and ran all over) Perennial Contender Seattle, or are you really that sad sack squad that got body slammed by Houston?  There’s so much potential outta these guys, it makes you want to believe.  At the same time, the inconsistent play prompts anyone with some sense to pump the brakes on them a bit.  Whereas Miami has proven (thus far) to be a pretender.  Getting shut out in the London Game – by the Saints, who can’t stop a running faucet with a handle?  That’s disturbing.  I’m inclined to lose faith in the Dolphins, but they are at Home.  And in a (projected) rainstorm of an afternoon, they get one last shot outta me.  I know I’ll regret this.


Miami rights the ship at Home.
Tennessee  14
Miami          17 ✓




Los Angeles(A) vs New York(N) (-3) (o/u 45)
an image of Week 5 Picks LAC vs NYG hemets

So it’s come to this: the loser bowl.  WoW.  As far as the Chargers go, I never understood the love you guys were given.  The LA move was stupid, and the team can’t beat anybody.  Anybody.  And fortunately for Los Angeles (yuck!), the New York Football Giants pop up on the schedule.  These Giants are a layup if ever there was one.  They can’t run, they can’t block, and they struggle to score.  Easy Win, right?  Thing is, this is the week that New York gets on the board.  You blow this one G-men & YOU ARE the worst!


Giants Win at Home because….fuck it. Somebody has to Win.
Los Angeles(A) 38
New York(N)     41 ✓

Arizona vs Philadelphia (-6.5) (o/u 45)
an image of Week 5 Picks ARI vs PHI helmets

Finally(!) after all of that slop, a proper game.  Arizona, a team that seems to be in Must-Win mode every week is slated to face a pretty strong Philadelphia Eagles team that could be ready to take off.  This matchup is problematic for the Cards in the sense that it represents a pretty tough Road Game.  However, if these Cardinals can take advantage of Philly’s banged up secondary, then it lowers their degree of difficulty significantly.  As for the Eagles, do ya think you’re a Contender?  Fine.  Beat Arizona.  Keeping it real here, Zona’s no slouch.  Their strongest teams are in the past, but they are good enough to beat your green ass at home.  If you think you are genuinely the best team in The NFC East, here’s your opportunity to prove it.


Philly Wins a close ballgame
Arizona           24 ✓
Philadelphia   27




Baltimore vs Oakland (-2.5) (o/u 39)
an image of Week 5 Picks BAL vs OAK helmets

Welcome to the latest edition of “who’s struggling more?”.  In this matchup, we’ve got a toothless Baltimore travelling out West to face a less-than-inspiring Oakland Raiders.  This may be a down year for the Ravens.  It’s not that I think they suck; it’s more that they ain’t the same team without their key guys.  As for the Raiders, they’re dealing with their own significant injury – to their Quarterback no less.  And the last word on the matter appears to be that Carr won’t play.  And from a Raiders perspective, that changes nothing.  After a tough 2 game stretch, Oakland gets back to their home turf.  If you’re really a Super Bowl Contender Oakland, you take this one.


I got the Raiders getting it done at Home (and covering).
Baltimore 10
Oakland    17 ✓



Kansas City vs Houston (Pick’em) (o/u 45.5)
an image of Week 5 Picks KC vs HOU helmets

And now we get to the best matchup of the week (that I’m picking).  The undefeated Kansas City Chiefs take on a surprisingly good Houston Texans team.  These Chiefs sure have been rolling.  After Winning an epic Monday Nighter, this could be a pretty stiff Road Test for KC.  Houston may have found some magic in their Rookie Quarterback, as they had New England on the ropes before falling in Foxboro.  They followed up that effort with a stunning beat down of Tennessee, laying claim to being the best team in the AFC South.  Can Kansas City bottle this amazing Rookie up in prime time?  I don’t think so.  In another Pick Em affair, I got Houston taking down The League’s lone unbeaten team.


Take the over in this one people.
Kansas City 31
Houston       36 ✓



That’s it for this week.  We’re probably in for some more craziness.  Buckle up and enjoy the games!

My Season so far

ATS: 4-13 (Aye Yai Yai!)

Redskins: 2-2

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4 thoughts on “Week 5: Picks and Predictions

  1. Ok i I read and saw your picks so here are mine.
    Browns win today because simply they have to win one day and i think that day is today.
    Titans beat the fins i just think they are better even though they have split personality if you know what i mean.
    Cards over eagles even rhough neither team is impressive but cards secondary to me will get it done.
    Im not sure about Raiders vs Ravens but with Carrs injury im going with B’more on this one.
    K.C. will beat houston i like what watson is doing but K.C. wont get their first loss today i think they are to much for the texans.
    Now last but not least you know me very well so you know im goung with the G-men now with that being said dont mistake are terrible O-line for us being a terrible team 2 last second field goals we would be .500 team but hey things didn’t work out. But be afraid cause if we do get it together starting today you know we can very well be a dangerous team.

    • Once again, thank you Aaron for your comments.

      As for the game picks:

      -I can get with the logic on Cleveland, but the Jets are the superior
      team (and playing better ball).
      -Tennessee is too inconsistent to be trusted. And Miami is certainly a better team than they’ve shown to this point. They should Win.
      -I have to disagree with you on Philly. The Eagles are a quality up-and-coming team (they look like a Playoff caliber squad to me). They should Beat Arizona.
      -The Ravens are too beat up to be considered to be a factor. And if Oakland IS a Contender, then this is a ballgame they need to have.
      -KC is a better team, but Deshaun Watson has been special. I’m going out on a limb here, but I expect him to put on a show (& Beat KC) tonight.

      As for your Giants, there simply isn’t enough talent across the board in New York for them to challenge for anything. In fact, I don’t believe they have an NFL caliber Left Tackle on their roster.

      Brace for a long year in NYC my friend. But I did take them to Win today, if that’s any consolation.

      • Hey my Giants have talent but no leadership thats the difference. You don’t go 11-5 to 0-4 without pour leadership and it starts with our GM down to head coach. Someone if not both of them has to go. Now as far as some of the picks i guve you Philly cause they are proving me wrong right now but i still say the fins are some shit especially with cutler back there. And we’ll see about Deshaun. I like him i think he’ll have a good game but still say cheifs are too much.

        • I don’t know about the “Giants have talent” part.

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